Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Love, Marriage and the Movies: A Theory
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I went to see "The Proposal" with my wife and some friends this past weekend - and it actually wasn't that bad. It's funny though, how when you go to a romantic comedy, all of the previews before the movie are for other romantic comedies. I noticed a similar plot line after about the 4th preview, and it goes something like this:
Perhaps this is the message that we are being sold again and again: The story ends once you find love, once you get the girl, once you have the great wedding and the beautiful picture, that is the highest point of life and the climax and after that it's not really worth living, let alone making a movie about. Having just read Shane Hipps' "Flickering Pixels," I can't help but think about the sub-surface message that is sent simply by the medium of watching Hollywood movies - something like: "This is an example of a life that is really worth something, and if your life doesn't match this in some regard, no one really cares."
The result is obvious: We seek romantic, exciting and passionate love in life, but once we find it, we easily give it up for the next affair or the next exciting encounter. We have forgotten that the truly exciting thing is living together, going through life, supporting and growing together throughout our entire lives!
This is the same in our relationship with God - evangelicals love to overemphasize the conversion story, and we give testimonies that are exciting, full of ups and downs, and then have a wonderful conclusion of when we "found Jesus," - The End. But we all know that isn't the end, but only the beginning of the really exciting part of life, namely living and walking in step with God every day. And it's also true of love and marriage.
I don't want to find love - I want to live in love every day, whether they decide to make a movie about it or not.
I went to see "The Proposal" with my wife and some friends this past weekend - and it actually wasn't that bad. It's funny though, how when you go to a romantic comedy, all of the previews before the movie are for other romantic comedies. I noticed a similar plot line after about the 4th preview, and it goes something like this:
- Person struggles with life, mainly because they don't have love
- Has the potential to find love with a certain someone, but there are challenges
- Finds wonderfully exciting, new and unique (movie-worthy) love
- End of movie.
Perhaps this is the message that we are being sold again and again: The story ends once you find love, once you get the girl, once you have the great wedding and the beautiful picture, that is the highest point of life and the climax and after that it's not really worth living, let alone making a movie about. Having just read Shane Hipps' "Flickering Pixels," I can't help but think about the sub-surface message that is sent simply by the medium of watching Hollywood movies - something like: "This is an example of a life that is really worth something, and if your life doesn't match this in some regard, no one really cares."
The result is obvious: We seek romantic, exciting and passionate love in life, but once we find it, we easily give it up for the next affair or the next exciting encounter. We have forgotten that the truly exciting thing is living together, going through life, supporting and growing together throughout our entire lives!
This is the same in our relationship with God - evangelicals love to overemphasize the conversion story, and we give testimonies that are exciting, full of ups and downs, and then have a wonderful conclusion of when we "found Jesus," - The End. But we all know that isn't the end, but only the beginning of the really exciting part of life, namely living and walking in step with God every day. And it's also true of love and marriage.
I don't want to find love - I want to live in love every day, whether they decide to make a movie about it or not.
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3 comments:
interestingly, the films that are made about the other side of finding love, are generally devastating and/or humorous accounts of broken relationships and broken families - the "Drama" genre. these films often offer more depth and meaning than the typical romantic comedy, but even so, they still perpetuate the idea that after you find love, everything falls apart.
in the same vein, maybe, Christians (in general) have an obsession with hypocrisy and judgement for the saved and sanctified.
Thanks for the comment Tom - I especially think your last point is right on. We tend to focus on the "flashy" things like hypocrisy, judgment and the like, and forget that there really isn't much substance or "story line" there at all.
I think there are actually tons more parallels with the whole movie genre, and I think its fascinating to consider how going to the movies again and again and again affects how we think of our own lives and our own sense of personhood, especially compared to 50 or a 100 years ago -
anyway - thanks again for the comment
i love your new layout!!
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