Jesse A. Schroeder

I missed Red, White and Boom this year, and the fireworks in my suburb. I was traveling home on July 3, when many areas were having local fireworks. I was a little disappointed to have missed the annual Independence Day celebration.

But on the last leg of the flight home, from Atlanta to Columbus, we flew through a lightning storm. Actually we flew near, not through the storm. It was about 60 miles east, but close enough (at 36,000 ft) to see a constant display of cellestial fireworks. Bolts of lightning striking once every 2 or 3 seconds, for about a half hour. Very cool. Some of the best fireworks I've ever seen.

When we left Guatemala last week, I felt as though I had come to the end of a long road, with nowhere left to go. We had prepared for so long and realized our dreams, what could possibly be next? I felt like I didnt know where to go, because I had exhaustes all known options.

The trip this week in Nicaragua has felt like walking through a door. Every door, no matter how small, is a passageway, has frame underwhich one must pass. This week, I have passed through in a renewing experience. I have seen new things, discovered a new love for a new people, and a whole host of new options is open before me. I feel equally uncertain of where to go next, but now because there are so many options.

The road is laid out before me. I have stepped through the door, and I will continue forward on the journey, with fear and trembling.

Kel and I traveled to North Carolina this weekend for the wedding of a good friend. It took place in a beautiful park and that afforded us the chance to take some fun pictures. The wedding was windy, but beautiful. They had large tents set up for the reception, which reminded me so much of our own wedding, almost 8 years ago now.

In addition to Guatemala, we celebrated a wonderful year with our family: My niece, Skylar was born. Kellye's brother, Jon, turned 30. My brother and sis-in-law left for Cambodia, and we are excited about their work and ministry there. Kel and I were also able to travel within the United States, with her family to Maine, and just the two of us to Puerto Rico. 

2010 was a great year. 

So do we try to do even more in 2011? What awaits us in the next few months? Kellye and I have been talking at length about the options, choices and opportunities that we have for this coming year. As I mentioned, we will be leading another team to Guatemala in June, and we are incredibly excited for this second trip. It seems that in March, our good friends Oscar and Telma (the native missionaries in Guatemala) will be able to visit Ohio. This will be their first visit to the United States. Also, Hearts for Heaven Ministry has just purchased property that they intend to use as a career/vocational training center. The growth, the relationships, the changed lives - there is so much about our connection with Guatemala that is exciting and humbling. This year's trip with the team will only be one small part of our ongoing connection with this beautiful country and the people we love from there. 

Late last year, we were invited to join another team on a "pilot trip" to Nicaragua. This will be the first trip of its kind to the specific churches we will be visiting, and Kellye and I will be in charge of the kids' program. We will get to visit two churches and do three kids' programs at each location. We have never been to Nicaragua. We have never traveled with this specific mission organization together. We have never led a trip like this before. There are many unknowns, but many exciting aspects as well. It is an opportunity to be involved with the first step of strengthening and building up the ministries of local churches in this area. It's a chance to see a new part of the world and meet new people. It's a chance and an opportunity we have decided we are going to take. 

I have been studying in the Ohio State Master's of Social Work program for about 2 quarters now. I have learned more information about the summer study abroad trip to Mexico, and I have decided that this is a trip I want to take. I will be focusing my studies on immigration issues, international social work, and the people and culture of Mexico. I would love to work with immigrant populations in the United States after I graduate, and the possibilities of doing international social work (in Guatemala for example) are also very exciting. But deciding to go on this trip means that I will be out of the country for about 5-6 weeks of my summer. That's a big commitment and a lot of time to miss working and saving money. It has been a difficult decision, and one that Kellye and I have discussed at length, but we are deciding to move forward in this direction. 

There are even more things that will happen this year: I get to be a party of the HOBY Ohio South conference again. I will start my second year studying at OSU. Kellye continues in her new job. We hope to visit friends and family around the country. We like to plan ahead for these events, but sometimes its overwhelming to think about it all at once!! It is going to be an exciting year. 

But I am also afraid of some things. I'm afraid I have decided to try to do too much. I'm afraid of failing at any or all of the goals I have set for myself, or not fulfilling the promises I have made to other people. I'm afraid that the stress of all these activities will hurt my marriage. I'm worried that I have made bad financial decisions, and I don't know how all of these activities will be paid for. 

But I don't want to live in fear and worry. I have always believed that God is ready and willing to do more, to move beyond the life we are currently living, and to help us discover what faith really looks and feels like. This is a line that I use to encourage students who are going on trips with us, but I feel like this year Kellye and I are learning to live in faith again. We are learning to keep maintain a balance between dreams and reality, between working hard and resting, between connecting with other people and maintaining our strong connection with each other. 

I know that 2011 will be a great year, regardless of how all of the above mentioned events turn out. I know that I need God's help in 2011. I know that I need the help, support, love and prayer of the people are me - family, friends, coworkers, fellow students, the emergent cohort, and all the people who know Kellye and me well. I look forward to sharing with all of you the exciting stories about how we have experienced and seen God's kingdom here on earth in this year, 2011.